I'mWideAwakeItsMorning.

Dear World,

You are utmost frustrating. If I were writing this on paper I wouldn't know who to send it to.

The sky is getting light purple as it is now 7am and the sounds of cars passing North & South on Bathurst is on a steady rise and has been for two hours.

Majority of these people are going to work. Going to keep Canada from becoming third-world. Going to spend the very little of the time we have here to afford the commodities we are conditioned to believe to need.

I'm sending this letter out to the internet because I don't know who else I would send it to.

As a species we are caught in a ferocious struggle between wild animal and conditioner. We put products in our fur. Most of our bodies are bald and I'm sure we're very ugly to other animals. There are species of plant designed to be more attractive than we are to each other. Most of all I feel we lack the balance we once held in the animal kingdom. Snow Geese give birth to a bunch of goslings, a fox comes by and puts 4 or 5 adorable fluffy puff balls into her mouth, takes them back to 3 equally adorable fox pups and we watch as the baby foxes eat the baby geese.

Our children would be food for larger prey.

Witnesses have also experienced great acts of inter-special kindness. Wildlife footage depicts a mother hippo actually saving a gazelle from the mouth of a crocodile. There are sick and dying people in the world and all I feel like I can do is put change into those plastic bottles all over town.

It's impossible to be half as happy as I should be knowing my reality is someone's paradise and yet I don't feel as I will do anything to help them in my lifetime. And the officials I will elect, will not take the right steps to help them because suffering is necessary for happiness.

I will give you fifty dollars to take away my guilt.

Please tell the starving children in Africa who don't have Playstation 3 yet that I'm at a point in my life where I'm feeling a little too angsty to assist them or their country.

But hey! I'm young maybe I'll go through an activist phase in college and go visit Haiti for a week and take a bunch of photos with orphans and then come back here and tell everyone how eye-opening it was.

Speaking of open eyes. Mine can't stay open any longer.

Explain yourself to me world, where do I fit in you and how can I fit there without living knowing my happiness comes at the price of great sadness and pain.

From,

Gabie.